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Secrets of Finding Love for the Second Time

The one you loved the most is gone; left you with broken heart and damaged trust; whether it was tragic end or mutual understanding, it is inevitable to avoid the feelings of being lost and hopeless when you say goodbye to your first love. You are isolating yourself from others and ignoring the advice of friends and family but one day you will realize it is time to pick up yourself and welcome love for the second time in your life. The following suggestions will help you to achieve that:

1. Allow yourself time to heal

You cannot build a strong house on a scattered ground; give yourself some time to over come both emotional and physical damage from last relationship before moving on to a new one. Jumping into another relationship may sound like the best way to forget what happened but unbalanced mind can affect your decision to choose the right person.

2. Leave the past in the past

You might find it tempting to stock your ex on Facebook or Twitter to see if he/she has moved on but if you hang onto your past you may not treat your future one right and it is not fair to the person who wants to be with you. So try to resist the feeling and tell yourself that you and your past partner no longer share a life together and what he/she is up to is none of your business.

3. Don’t compare it with your first love

No two people are exactly the same but it is unavoidable that you will compare this new person in your life with the one you were used to be with for a long time. You might find some habits of him/her odd and unfamiliar; thinking, “Why he/she sleeps with no pillow? My ex never used to do that!” or “He/She doesn’t like to cook! My ex used to love cooking!”. Before making any judgment, celebrate the differences in people and remember variety is what makes life more interesting!

4. Learn from your old relationships

Think about the rights and wrongs of your past experience and try to avoid making the same mistake twice; this applies to how you chose your partner, how you two got together, how your relationship developed and carried on, and how it all ended. It will help you to spot any trouble in your new love in an early stage and to work on it.

5. Be ready to compromise

What we got used to always seems to be comfortable and older we get, harder it gets to change our life habits such as early bedtime and house tidiness etc. It will be same for your new partner as well; so talk about the things you find difficult in each other’s habits and find a point to compromise; but do not forget that not all fixed attitude such as excessive drinking, abusive language and lying is agreeable and if your judgment says “No” make sure you put it across!